In your eyes
by lovinhale
Summary: Bella & Jacob has been together for years. Married with three kids, Bella decide she need some "girl time" to find herself again. She never thought she would find him. After a weekend away w/ best friends Alice & Rose her life may never be the same OOC/NC
1. Shock

Twelve years. Twelve years since I had seen those eyes. I would know them anywhere. But why here, why tonight. Was this the sign I wanted?

"Bella. BELLA! Earth to Bella." Alice shouted at me over the loud club music.

"WHAT!"

Trying to figure out what my focus was on she asked, " We just wanted to know what drink you want now"

" Double shot JD. NOW!" My hands were starting to shake. My face already flushed from my other drinks. Just looking in those eyes and my arousal became strong. _Oh God how could he still have this effect on me. _

" Are you sure Bella it has been a long time since you have been out with us. Maybe just another glass of wine or something not as strong?" Rose now scanning the crowd searching for the reason my sudden boldness.

" NO, I want a shot."

I took the drink from Alice. My glaze never leaving his. I down it in one long drink. " Alice, Rose if I am not back in five minutes, find me please" I started walking to him gathering all the courage I could. At this moment I was no longer Bella Black, wife, stay to home mom, the pleasing family matriarch. I was Izzy Swan, confident,fearless,strong and single woman with only one thought in my head. How my night would go, how would this night change my life. I was about to find out.

Both Alice and Rose finally saw what or who had my attention. At the same time they both gasp, "FUCK"

As we closed the distance, his glaze never leaving mine. We were inches apart and in the sultry southern voice he said, "Izzy is that really you."

" It's me Jasper, it's me"


	2. History

_**AN: This is my first official chapter ever :) I need a beta especially with my grammatical errors. If anyone is interested please let me know. I'm it is a little long but I need to get Bella's background out. At the same time there is so much more I want to say. If you have questions, ideas and suggestions please review. I have an outline for the story and knew where it is going but I still would love some advice. **_

_**Don't own..... but would love to borrow Jasper and Emmett. (sorry not a big Edward fan)**_

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There comes a day in every person's life where you question your choices. Today is that day for me. Isabella Swan Black.

Looking at my life from the outside, I have a good life and I am truly blessed. The outside is not always the true story. The outside can show you an image but not reality or true feelings.

I have a husband, Jacob, who loves me and three wonderful children. But am I happy? No. Don't get me wrong, I love my children more than anything in this world and I love my husband. I just am not "in love" with him any more. Do I enjoy my life? Sometimes, but most of the time no.

I guess you could say I am having a mid-life crisis, but I am only 34!

I grew up in a "normal" family being the only child. My dad, Charlie, was the chief of police in our small town in Forks, Washington. My mother, Renee, stayed at home with me. They were high school sweethearts that never left their hometown. The town was so small everyone knew everyone and gossip spread like wildfire. A fact that my father made sure I knew very well.

I never really thought of myself as one of the popular kids. Sure I played sports, I was apart of the student government, but it was more what was expected of me to do and not because my peers encouraged me. I looked at it as a way to get a better scholarship. I did not have any close friends. Never dated. I was ok to look at with my slender athletic build, dirty blond hair and dark brown eyes. No one wanted to date the chief's daughter or have him to find out about the secret parties on the weekends so I rarely got invited and never attended them. Instead I concentrated on school, my extracurricular activities, and making sure I got away from Forks. Even if it was just to somewhere else in the state.

I got a full scholarship to the University of Washington. I was so happy. Finally I chance to experience life, to be on my own. Don't get me wrong, I was brought up with a strong since of family. I knew I wanted kids. I hated being an only child and not having many I knew I needed to live life before then. It was not like I had any prospects beating down my door anyway. Even though my dream was to be a sports announcer, teaching was the logical choice for me. Or so my parents made sure it was the logical choice. I loved history. There was so many hidden stories and passions that people could learn from. To me, history was not about dates and documents, it was about people, their lives, their choices and how that effected each generation that followed. So with my "new" dream, I started my freshman year at college.

I arrived a week before classes to get my dorm assignment and get settled. I was able to get in the larger three person rooms that meant we would have our own bath, but had no idea who my room mates would be. The first thing I noticed when I walked in the lobby to the dorm was a short, dark haired girl yelling at the resident assistant because her closet space was entirely too small. " No female should have to only have five drawers and two feet of hanging space!" she screamed. She may have been small but I was terrified as I waited to get directions to my room. Frustrated she stepped aside for to calm down. I saw her pretty petite face that so did not match the powerful voice I had heard a few minutes earlier.

I stepped up to the desk to see a guy with spiked blond hair. He had a name tag, Mike. I gave him a weak smile " Hi,I'm Isabella Swan, but call me Bella. Can you tell me what room I am in?"

As he looked up my information, the small pixey beside me was looking me over. " I can see we will spend a lot of time together. You will need my help this semester. My name is Alice." as she put he hand out for me to shake.

Confused by her statement I just stared at her. " Why do I need your help Alice?"

" Because you need a make over. You can not wear stuff like that everyday." I looked myself over. I had on my favorite long basketball shorts and an old school t-shirt on. My hair was in a simple pony tail. No make up as usual. What was wrong? She could see my look of confusion. "Bella, you are starting college, you need to start dressing like a woman not a twelve year old."

Mike was quietly laughing and gave my an apologetic smile. " Bella, you are in room 315, and met one of your room mates, Alice."

Alice starting jumping up and down. Was she this hyper all the time? " Maybe this semester won't be so bad after all!" She said grabbing me and pulling toward our room.

When I walked in the room, I saw the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. She was taller than me and I was 5'7", had long light blond hair, sparkling blue eyes and a body I could only wish to have. She turned to see me and her look dripped with venom. "Alice, please tell me you are not picking up strays."

Alice rolled her eyes at her. "Rose be nice. This is Bella, our third room mate."

" What the hell is she wearing.?" Rose said still staring at me like I just killed her puppy. I moved to shake her hand but she turned to finish unpacking." Well you definitely have your work cut out for you with this one, Alice. She needs help with everything."

A little did I know at this moment I was with the two people who would become my best friends for life.

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My first semester when by fast. Alice holding true to her word gave me a complete make over. She cut my hair into a long bob and dyed it a lighter blond. Luckily due to my years playing basketball and softball I had pretty good muscle tone. Alice insistedthough we worked out anywhere. "Don't want to gain this freshman fifty" she said.

My class were pretty easy since they were mostly general studies at this point. My real education came from Alice and Rose's "extra curricular activities". They drug me to every club, party and social event all semester. Guys always gravitated to Rose and Alice. Rose with her beauty and Alice her confidence who would want to date them. I always felt like to five wheel. Sure guys would talk to me, but when they figured out I was not going to be an one night stand, they interest died. Alice and Rose made it their goal to teach me everything I would ever, I mean ever need to know about sex. From watching porn to taking me to the sex store, my eyes were opened. I just never got to put it to use.

Soon winter break came and it was time to go home. Alice was heading to Georgia. She had grown up in Atlanta. I thought with her love for fashion she would be a designer, but no she surprised me be being an accounting major. She said she wanted to make sure she had enough money to buy the fashions she wanted.

Rose was even more of a shock, mechanical engineering. I soon found out why. She could fix anything with an engine and said her did not want to depend on a man for anything. Rose had grown up in Chicago but never talked about her family. I always had a feeling she was hiding something.

We had decided when we came back for spring semester we would get an off campus apartment. Alice needed her closet space. That is where I met Jacob. I lived in our building with his friends, Embry and Quill. He was everything I had ever dreamed of . Tall, dark and handsome. Jacob was part Cherokee and had grew up in the mountains of Tennessee. He came to the west coast to get away from his family too. I learned his father was the mayor and he grew up with many of the same limits I had pushed upon me .He had taken many of the same classes I had since history was his major as well. He loved it as much as I did, if not more, especially Native American history.

Our relationship progressed quickly. I had never had a guys show so much interest in me. Jacob really took the time to be my said I was his girl next door, literally. Not a month after knowing each other we started dating. He was so sweet, always a gentlemen. Would give me the world if he could. We were that prefect couple. Everyone knew we would be together forever. He is four years old than me and taught me so much about life. Even without him telling me, I knew he had to work for everything he had. Just because your family is prominent, doesn't always mean they have money. We dated three years until he graduated and went back to Tennessee to work on his masters. Even though we loved each other very much, we knew a long distance relationship would be tough. We would visit each other on breaks best we could (trips across the country where not cheap) and talked everyday on the phone. But it was not the same. I was not the same person with Jacob gone. I felting like I was missing out on something. Something big. Thank goodness I had Rose and Alice.

When Jaocb finished his masters, he came back to Washington. He got a job teaching at the school and we were married justsix months later. Little did I know that the pill did not work 100% of the time and nine months later we would have our first child, Jacob Jr. or J.J as we call him. My pregnancy was terrible and I could not finish school. Four years later we had our daughter, Leah and I was able to go back and finish. These years were great even with the struggles of two small children, school and a husband that was addicted to his work. This is when Jacob was offered a job at the university near his hometown in Tennessee. An opportunity he could not turn down. So we moved. Away from my friends, my family so he can achieve more success. This is when we also found out I was pregnant with Seth.

So here I am today. The wife of eleven years and mother of three. Bella Black as everyone knows me. Stay at home mom, devoted wife, PTO President, volunteer of the year for youth sports in our town, you name it I help with it.I am by Jacob's side for his political speeches ( he is now the head of the town council), helping with the events for the university elite, there to cheer on JJ and Seth's sports teams that Jacob coaches all of, coaching Leah's cheerleading and softball. Our family is one of the cornerstones of this town. Just like how we both grew up.

I think it I finally hit me why I do so much. So that I don't remember. So I don't think about what could have the two years Jacob was gone, I was not the same Bella he knew and loved. That Jacob was not the first man to ask me to marry him. I became Izzy Swan, party girl.


	3. I can't get no

I knew what I needed. I needed to get away.

Since we had moved to Tennessee, I had not had a "girls" weekend- at least not with the people who truly knew me. Rose now lived in Chicago and Alice was back home in Atlanta. Even though we talked a few times a week, I had not been able to get away to see either of them. Memorial Day weekend was coming next month and I knew we had nothing plan with the kids. It was perfect- just one weekend to feel like myself again. The girl I missed. The girl I had not been in over ten years. The girls that I kept locked inside of me.

I picked up the phone to call in reinforcements.

" I knew you would be calling me today. How are you?" I never got a simple hello from Alice. It was like she knew when I was really down or needed just to vent.

" How would you like a visit from one of your oldest friends? How about...." I could not say anymore for the scream I heard on the other line.

"Bella, I can't wait! It has been too long! When?" I could even hear her bouncing in excitement on the other end. That girl's always had an overabundance of energy.

I had to laugh at her. A smile was already on my face. " Calm down Alice. Not for another month. I was thinking Memorial Day weekend. The kids will be out of school so it will be easier on Jacob. Plus I thought it would give Rose enough to plan to join us, just like old times....." I drifted, the excitement was starting to build in me.

" Yes, I can see it now. We are going to have so much fun! I'll plan the entire weekend." the little psychic would have everything planned to a "T".

"Alice, just limits the amount of time you plan on playing dress up with me and we'll be fine." I knew she would want to go shopping but I hated the hours sitting while she did my makeup and hair.

"Fine, just remember you will be on my turf so what I say goes! You got it!"

" OK, ok. So do you want to call Rose or should I ?"

" I will. I have a few ideas I want to run by her," she laughed.

"Alice, I love you, but nothing too wild, alright. I want to have fun, but we're not as young as we use to be."

" Speak for yourself, Bella! I still can do everything I could in college and more," she said with a huff. " Now, do you want Rose to come alone or bring one of her 'friends' ?"

" NO!. Just the three of us. Tell her she can go one weekend without one of her sex toys." We both laughed at that. Rose never settled down but she does have a boyfriend ……and a girlfriend.

" Ok, I love you, Bella and I can't wait to see you. Tell the kids and Jacob I said hi. Call me when you know what time you are leaving.

" Thanks Alice. You are truly a lifesaver."

With that my girl's weekend was set. Now I just needed to settle everything at home. Jacob would not be happy I was leaving him with the kids, but he could get over it. For once, I am standing up for what I want. I right now I want away from here.

The week before Memorial Day, I had everything packed ready to go. Although, I knew no matter what I took Alice would have different clothes for me to wear.

Little Leah did not understand if it was a "girls' weekend" why she was stuck with her brothers. Unlike me, she loved to play dress up with "Aunt" Alice. Alice was the best at making Leah feel like a princess. Seth did not want me to go either. JJ, however, was happy to have his dad around all weekend. I was would admittedly miss my kids, but I needed this. I needed my friends. I needed me.

Just like I thought, Jacob was not too excited about me being gone for a holiday weekend, but he knew I missed my friends. "Why don't they come here to see you. It's in the middle anyway," he reasoned.

" Jacob, the girls would love to see you and the kids, but they're both big city girls. A weekend in the mountains is not their idea of exciting. Plus, Alice has plans for us everyday and Rose's airfare was cheaper to Atlanta than Knoxville. I just, I don't know, I need a change of scenery and the big city for a few days." I sighed. As much as I did love Jacob, we did not really talk anymore. We just existed. I knew he really didn't understand.

" I know, I know. I will just miss you" as he wraps his arms around my waist. " I don't like sleeping in our bed alone."

I knew he was trying to be sweet, but somehow it just doesn't feel right the same as it used to.

" Jacob, you go on trips for the university all the time and sleep alone. I am here alone. What's the difference?" I knew the real answer to that question, he was off having fun those times while I was the one at home making sure everything was ok.

" Yeah but I don't have so many reminders of you." he nearly growled as he started kissing my neck.

I knew what he wanted, but I just had no desire at that moment. Once upon a time, the slightest touch from Jacob would get my blood flowing and I would melt. But that was a long time along. Now, even when I was aroused it wasn't the same. Sometimes, he could still get me off, sometimes I would just fake it until I could just take care of myself. When I first met Jacob I, had never even been touched by a guys and had never dreamed of touching myself.

That was the other part of my education from Alice and Rose.....

_Flashback_

_It was the first Christmas since Jacob and I started dating that he was going back home and I was sulking. _

"_I don't know what I am going to do with myself when Jacob goes home," I said, feeling sorry for myself._

"_What are you talking about? I mean, it's not like you will be here either. You are going to see your parents, right?" Alice asked very confused. _

_"Yeah, you some time away from each other anyways. I swear he is like a dog the heat sometimes." Rose was always complaining Jacob never let me have time for my friends anymore. And if I did, he was with me._

" _Of course I'm going to see them. It's Christmas. But I not used to Jacob not being in bed with me anymore...." I trailed off._

_Then my blush gave it all away._

" _OH. MY. GOD." Rose screamed " You're worried about not getting laid! Our sweet little virginal Bella gets her first boyfriend and now she can't go a day without sex." _

" _I AM NOT!!" I denied, my traitor face getting redder and redder._

"_What is the big deal? Just handle it yourself. You can manage for two weeks without the real thing. Hell, I manage all the time" Alice added like we were talking about shoes. _

"_I can't do that, Alice" I squeaked. I could not believe them._

"_YOU HAVE NEVER MASTERBATED HAVE YOU?!" Rose laughed._

"_No" I said in a whisper, my face on fire._

"_Why the hell not?" Rose was laughing even louder._

" _Um, well, I-I don't know how," I said even softer._

"_Well I guess it is time for class. Everyone get your purse we are off to the store." clapped Alice_

" _What do you mean 'the store'? What does THAT have to do with shopping? And who said I wanted to learn how to do THAT?" I was getting so confused._

_My parents never gave me the sex talk. The only thing they told me was not to do it and that if I did, I could get pregnant. Even though I had been on the pill since I was sixteen- because of problems I had each month- I was worried it would happen. Not that I had the opportunity before Jacob, but still. Jacob had taught me everything. He was my first real kiss, first love, first lover. _

"_Bella dear, we will show you everything. You could even surprise Jacob with a few things." Alice knowingly smiled._

_I knew I was in for a long afternoon. Little did I know that it would be some of the most useful education I receive in all of my college career._

_We all got in Rose's red convertible and were off. Neither said a word the entire drive. They just sat there with huge smiles on their faces. I was terrified of where they were taking me. I was in shock when we pulled into a normal looking brick strip mall a few miles from campus. This place didn't look scary. Rose parked in front of the end store, only you could not see in the windows. The sign was plain yellow with black letters, " 21 Forever". Nothing to indicate what was on the other side of that door. _

_Rose and Alice each grabbed an arm and pulled me inside. I nearly fainted when I saw the store's inventory. At first, it looked like any other modern bookstore. I saw one wall full of video cases, a few aisles of books and magazines. But as we made our way to the back, I saw the reason the girls came here. The entire back wall was covered in vibrators, dildos, lubes, you name it, it was there. _

_" Bella, welcome to our self help 101," Alice beamed. " We will find you anything and everything you need to "relieve" yourself while you are away from Jacob. And maybe a few things for when you are with him as well."_

_"I-I-I... What are those....things?" I had never seen anything like them. _

_About that time a cute clean cut blond guy about your age walks up." Those are most girls best friends" he joked. " Hey Alice, Rose, I see you've got a newbie with you. I'm surprise she's never been here before if she's a friends of you guys." _

_I swear if I could hide I would crawl in a hole and never come out at this moment. _

_"Hi, I'm Mike and how may I be in your service today?" as he looked me up and down._

_" Mike shut up and let Alice and me handle this one. Poor Bella here is already scared to death. I don't think she is ready for your input or your 'service'," Rose stated._

_" Bella, what a beautiful name to match a beautiful girl." Mike reached out to shake my hand "I owe the place so if you have any questions please come see me. However, these two could probably teach a class of most of my products in the store."_

_I just stared at him as I shook his hand. I didn't know what to say._

_"Mike how did you know that's what we are doing today, teaching a class for Bella." Alice said almost too proudly. _

_"Well rest assured, Bella, you are in good hands. I should know right Rose?"_

_" Ugh, Mike, you will never let me forget that night will you." Rose hissed._

_"Of course not, I am looking forward to the next one. I'll let you girls get to it and I see a customer that had a special order waiting. Nice to meet you." and with that Mike was gone._

_I was still standing there speechless as I studied the wall. Alice goes over grabs a basket and starts filling it. "Rose which one should we start her out on battery operated or plug in." _

_"Battery first, the other might blow her mind too much" Rose declared with a smile._

_As they continued their banter back on forth I just waited to escape. Finally after about a hour we checked out. _

_"You've got a lot of good choices here Bella, make me proud," smiled Mike as we walked out the door. _

_That is still the most embarrassing moment of my life._

"Jacob, the kids are in the other room. We can't....." I tired to reason as he continued his assault.

"That is what locks are for. We can hurry." he smiled into my neck.

I knew what that meant, what he wanted. I also knew that I would not get off. Jacob would think it was great. I would pretend to enjoy it, and he would be satisfied. I would continue to live the life expected of me- making sure everyone else was happy.

Five more days. Just five more days and I could live for me. Even if it was only for the weekend.


	4. Waking up in Atlanta

**OK so it has been awhile. Don't we just all hate when real life makes sure we pay attention. This chapter was tough to get through. It is a filler to get to the good stuff _*smiles*_**. ** I want to give two big THANK YOUS to PJJ0930 and Dalia907 I appreciate both of your help!!!!!**

**NEXT I hate when people do this but, PLEASE REVIEW!!!. I've had almost 400 hits and only 4 reviews. Come on guys give me some love. **

**Also the boys are coming soon and you will get a few chapters some their POV. And here is our next chapter. **

Bright and early I left Friday morning before Jacob and the kids were up. I wanted to make the most of my time and knew Alice would be waiting me. She took the day off and Rose's flight was coming up at noon so I wanted to make it before it was time to pick her up. Especially with Atlanta traffic and the airport being on the south side of town. Alice lived in the north part near Buckhead.

It is amazing the weight that was lifted off my shoulders the minute I got on I-75 leading me to Atlanta. I took the convertible beetle so that I could enjoy the beautiful drive ahead of me. Not to mention I love this little car. It made me feel young again. The four hour drive thru the mountains of Tennessee was glorious as I blasted my Ipod. Instead of my usual Tom Petty or Aerosmith, I need some female strength and played some Beyonce', Lady Gaga and Katy Perry. I already feel the freedom and my hopes were high for the weekend.

I called Alice when I past the I-285 bypass to get directions. It was only ten in the morning and I knew Alice would be ready and waiting for me.

" Morning Ali," I smiled before she could even answer.

"Sounds like someone has more energy than even me this morning." Alice laughed

" Yes I do and I am ready to start my weekend. I am about fifteen minutes away I think. I just need directions from your exit."

" That is great. We have a little while before Rose's flight. We can get you settled and unpacked and head that direction. I can't believe I will have both here with me all weekend. It has been too long since I have had my two best friends to cause trouble with."

" Alice we are too old to get in trouble. What would I tell my kids? How would I explain it to Jake 'Honey, I know I'm married mother of three, but can you come bail me out of jail' I don't think so."

"Sweetie, we can do some much without going to jail. Atlanta has many hot spots to go to. I have our afternoon and night planned. You will be so surprised."

Surprised I am sure. Happy I hope so. Free... Hell yes!

I arrived at Alice's townhouse quickly. It was the first time I had seen it in person. It was beautiful. I wouldn't expect anything less from her. I wish my home to could like this. With three kids nothing is ever in place and there is no need to decorate too much. Alice was even more hyper than usual as was I. It was the first time we will all be together since my wedding. I quickly put my bag in my room and it was time to leave to get Rose.

We left in Alice's jeep. I know big shock. The tiny little pixie and her big jacked up Jeep. We always joked with her that she had a Daisy Duke complex.

As typical southern weather, it was getting humid and hot. But we were too excited to care. The top was off and we were going to get our third musketeer. I forgot how huge the Atlanta airport was and unfortunately we didn't know which terminal her flight came in. We waited about ten minutes before Rose call and said her was on her way. When we saw her come to the pick up area, we looked like a bunch of silly teenagers by the we were jumping and screaming in a group huge. Rose was as beautiful as even. Her long following blond hair and incredible figure had every male staring in our direction.

"Ok Alice now that we are all together, what is first on the list to do" I asked hoping the shopping would wait at least a day.

" First lunch at the best known hamburger place in town. No need to be healthy today. This is a special occasion. So first to The Varsity and then to see some of my favorite boys."

Rose and I just looked at each other. Knowing Alice that statement could mean anything. So I decided I didn't care. What happens will happen. " We are at your mercy, Alice. Just be gentle." I laughed.

"Hell yeah!" screamed Rose. So we were off to gain twenty pounds eating and hopefully staying out of too much trouble.


End file.
